That State of Mind…

– By Radhika Vasanth

What irritates me is the fact that people don’t see what they are losing, even when it’s sliding right under one’s nose. I dressed up, looked into the mirror and saw a girl; I never knew I could ever be.

“This is fake!” I thought. But, it still was me.

I tossed in a few shots of Vodka. Felt the buzz in my head. The buzz was like the instant recharge for courage. I had waited long enough for this. I closed my eyes and I pictured his face. I couldn’t wait longer.

I dialled his number, “Where are you?” I asked.

“The Barfer’s”, he answered asked “Why?”

“Can you meet me, now?” I asked, as my heart thumped faster than usual.

“I don’t think…” he started.

“I will drive halfway” I said, cutting through his words.

There was a pause. I waited.

“Okay, I will meet you at the W.T. Road”, he said.

“Thanks!” I said, trying not to sound happy.

“Are you okay?” he asked.

“There is something I want to try”, I answered.

“What?” he asked with confusion in his tone.

“You will see when you come” I said and hung up before he could pour in more questions.

The taxi arrived and I hopped in. I closed my eyes. I replayed things that I had in my mind. Few journeys can sure be longer.

I reached. He was early (for once in his life).

“Hi”, he said when he saw me. “Is everything ok?”

I was not there for his questions. I half ran and hugged him.

I felt the spark run all over me. It tingled into every cell in my body. I felt his arms wrapped around me.

I smiled.

“Hey, are you sure, you are okay?” he asked

He had not felt the spark. It was just me. I let him go. Looked at his ever sparkling eyes and walked away, as he stood there, confusion creeping into him.


(Illustration by Vishrutha Venkatesh)


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